Do not pass Go. Go directly to the boardroom. You have lost your annual bonus, and there are no ‘Company Car’ cards left on the table.

The following quiz consists of four questions that tell you whether or not you are qualified to be a professional. Do not cheat. We will know. You have been warned. The questions are not that difficult. You just need to think like a professional.

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe in, and close the door. This question tests whether or not you do simple things in a complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

Incorrect answer: Open the refrigerator, put the elephant in, and close the door.
Correct answer: Open the refrigerator, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, and close the door. This question tests your foresight.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?

Correct answer: The elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. This tests if you are capable of comprehensive thinking.

Okay, if you did not do well in those last three questions, this may be your last chance to test your qualification to be a True Professional:

4. There is a river known for its vicious man-eating crocodiles. How do you cross it?

Correct answer: just swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the animal conference. This tests your reasoning ability.

If you answered all four questions correctly, you are a True Professional. Wealth and success await you. If you answered three out of four, there is still some hope for you. If you answered two out of four, consider a career as a hamburger flipper in a fast food joint. If you answered one out of four, try selling some of your organs, it’s the only way you will make any money. If you answered none correctly, just forget everything, there’s no point in going on.

Condoleezza Rice holds bathtime talks with senior undersea commanders. Don’t you wish you were her loofa?
(courtesy The Onion)

Fast forward many years: Trevor moved to Austin, Texas, and I moved to London. I was of course many years older than him, and we lost even the small contact that we (never) really had. But then I got word of him, the work that he was doing, and the talents that he was applying, and I was totally awestruck… It’s so strange: his mom and dad, who were such great people, and such great friends, have passed the baton to Trevor for me. Hard to explain, this complex mix of time and emotion. Looking at his Facebook photographs, those faded old Maxie Street images, of him, and brother Stephen, and sister Elise, all those years past, just took me away and blew me down (what?) and I was wordless. The kid is a man, and the man is amazing. (Sorry to sound so effusive, Trev, but it’ll pass…) Click on the link under Blogroll to see his blog.

The following is from his website, www.trevorromain.com, which says it all:

As an award-winning author and illustrator of a series of self-help books for children, Trevor is a much sought-after motivational speaker. He hosts the Trevor Romain animated DVD series with a cast of animated friends using humorous adventures based on his books to teach real life lessons for kids. Trevor’s series of self-help books has sold more than a million copies worldwide and have been published in 16 different languages.

Experiences from Trevor’s own childhood form the basis for his unique approach to difficult subjects. Born in South Africa, Trevor was challenged by dyslexia as a child and attended special education classes until he reached the fourth grade. At age 18, he was called for two years’ mandatory service in the South African Army. Early in his military service, an emotional experience with a severely injured child cemented Romain’s desire to work with children and help them deal with difficult life situations.

Before writing and illustrating books, Trevor spent a number of years as a creative director at various prominent advertising agencies, including Saatchi & Saatchi, BBD&O and Ogilvy Mather. Eventually, he came to the United States to broaden his publishing options and pursue a career working with children.

For years, Trevor has traveled to schools and hospitals nationwide, delivering stand-up comedy with self-help messages to tens of thousands of school children. In 2003, he teamed up with a filmmaker and a small group of investors to form the Company to distill his children’s books and speeches into a series of animated adventures with underlying real life lessons for children supplemented by curriculum that would be relevant and essential to educator’s.

Trevor is well known for his work in the local and national community as a board member of the National Candlelighters Childhood Cancer Foundation, and Any Baby Can. He has taken his mission overseas, as well, performing for children at military bases around the globe on multiple USO tours. The United Nations also has enlisted Trevor’s help in developing educational materials for children living in armed conflict areas.

Trevor Romain sees himself as Monty Python meets Dr. Seuss at Jerry Seinfeld’s house in Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood. That self-description may be difficult to imagine, but one thing is crystal clear – Trevor’s rapport with kids is stunning to watch. He has an almost mystical connection with children that he uses to make them laugh uproariously, while teaching them to face life’s most difficult trials with courage and optimism.

CONGRATULATIONS and best wishes to darling daughter Gemma on the occasion of her 28th birthday, today on Sunday 22nd February. And you know what she did on her birthday? She sat an acupuncture exam in London. And another one yesterday, so she was swatting up like crazy all the way to London. Oh dear! But that does show grit and determination, you have to admit. Loads and loads of love from mom and dad. x x x
PS: And she doesn’t look a day older than 19!!

epistemology |iˌpistəˈmäləjē|
noun, Philosophy
the theory of knowledge, esp. with regard to its methods, validity, and scope.
Epistemology is the investigation of what distinguishes justified belief from opinion.
ORIGIN mid 19th cent.: from Greek epistēmē ‘knowledge,’ from epistasthai ‘know, know how to do.’